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Izrul
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Joined: 21 Jan 2008
Posts: 6
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# Posted: 24 Jan 2008 12:29
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Hello there.
Most experts say that if we want to achieve life without stress, we do not need to avoid it but "response" to the situation you're facing.
Any idea what this mean?
What do you think about this?
Best Regards,
Izrul Fizal
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Scott Powers
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Joined: 30 Jan 2008
Posts: 8
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# Posted: 1 Feb 2008 17:16
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Yes, because when you respond to the situation and deal with it,
you will not be haunted by avoiding it.
It's actually MORE stressful trying to constantly avoid stress.
Just face your problem like a man and quit being a wussy.
Once you overcome the problem, you will feel as though a weight has been lifted off your shoulders. But running and hiding is hopeless and futile 'cause there aint no such thing as a "stress-free life".
Stress will find you no matter where you hide.
Stress can be managed, but you'll never be truly free from it until you die.
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Newbie Shield
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Joined: 22 Sep 2007
Posts: 702
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# Posted: 1 Feb 2008 17:58
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Hi Izrul,
It just means that instead of worrying about what is going on with it or what will happen, just do what you can about it and be happy with your effort. Don't worry about the outcome when you have done your best to manage the problem.
90% of our fears never manifest so why give them any power?
~Newbie Shield~
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Izrul
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Joined: 21 Jan 2008
Posts: 6
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# Posted: 1 Feb 2008 21:05
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Thanks for the feedback guys.
I also managed to do some study regarding this topic with my friends. Most of them response saying that they are willing to handle their stress heads on, but they fear of the outcome that people will criticize them if they fail.
This just show that most of them still worry what will happen "if I do that or if I do this" dilemma.
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Vishal P. Rao
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Joined: 23 Jun 2005
Posts: 663
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# Posted: 2 Feb 2008 00:56
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Quoting: Izrul Most experts say that if we want to achieve life without stress, we do not need to avoid it but "response" to the situation you're facing.
There is a still better way - accept it. Responding may either bring you to situation you wanted or not. If it's what you wanted, then you are happy. And if it's not what you wanted, you are unhappy.
Accepting the situation as it is and surrendering to the divine brings enormous peace and is the truest way to bliss. It's very difficult but practicing it will change you are life. Seriously, there is nothing in this life you have absolute control over. You may die the very next moment. It may flood in your area. And so on... Start by accepting smaller shortcomings in your life. Say your neighbor's attitude. Creaking noise of your bathroom door. A particular dress of your spouse. And so on... Once you make it a habit of accepting things as it is, you can accept life as it is.
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Izrul
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Joined: 21 Jan 2008
Posts: 6
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# Posted: 2 Feb 2008 11:03
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As always Vishal, your input into this really is aspiring. I somewhat agree and disagree with your point though.
Yeah, if it is a small things that cause us stress like you've mentioned, we maybe can accept it. However, if it is a big or heavy things like for example, a naughty neighbor who for no reason kick our trash can outside our house until all the smelly rubbish come out every single day, we simply could not accept or ignore it.
Even if we accept the smallest thing around us that cause us a bit of stress will become big sooner or later.
I will go for the "response" to the stress rather than accepting it. However, I really appreciate your thought into this.
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Vishal P. Rao
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# Posted: 3 Feb 2008 06:36
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I agree with you on the neighbor part. I don't say you shouldn't act on anything. Act, but don't keep fighting. That's my point. One must learn to surrender too. But you can surrender only when you see the futility in expecting things to go your way all the time. And it's a very difficult act I must say. Much much difficult because your ego is at stake. Only when you drop your ego, can you surrender totally and it cannot be advised. It has to be experienced.
Quoting: Izrul Even if we accept the smallest thing around us that cause us a bit of stress will become big sooner or later.
It grows only if there's some resistance. You might have surrendered superficially. If you have fully accepted it, there is no point of it growing.
Thanks for differing
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reeg720
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Joined: 4 May 2008
Posts: 1
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# Posted: 4 May 2008 22:09
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there is no sense getting riled up when anything small happens, also whenever you get stressed just think, why is this stressful and why is this such a big deal. if it is a big deal then talk to someone about it and take a nice warm bath.
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