Work at Home Forum - An online community of those who work from home.
Humor Work at Home Forum / Humor /

Don't Let Worry Kill You -- Let the Church Help

Author Message
snowdog20
Forums Member
Joined: 28 May 2008
Posts: 4
#1 · Posted: 4 Jun 2008 08:36


Believe it or not, the following announcements actually appeared in various church bulletins.

Don't let worry kill you -- let the church help.

Thursday night - Potluck supper. Prayer and medication to follow.

Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community.

For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

The rosebud on the alter this morning is to announce the birth of David Alan Belzer, the sin of Rev. and Mrs. Julius Belzer.

This afternoon there will be a meeting in the South and North ends of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends.

Tuesday at 4:00 PM there will be an ice cream social. All ladies giving milk will please come early.

Wednesday the ladies liturgy will meet. Mrs. Johnson will sing "Put me in my little bed" accompanied by the pastor.

Thursday at 5:00 PM there will be a meeting of the Little Mothers Club. All ladies wishing to be "Little Mothers" will meet with the Pastor in his study.

This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Lewis to come foreward and lay an egg on the alter.

The service will close with "Little Drops of Water." One of the ladies will start quietly and the rest of the congregation will join in.

Next Sunday a special collection will be taken to defray the cost of the new carpet. All those wishing to do something on the new carpet will come foreward and do so.

The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind. They can be seen in the church basement Saturday.

A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music will follow.

At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What is Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practice.

__________________
Hi all from Diwaniyah, Iraq. I'm an american contractor. Been here since February 2006.
http://pipboxer.com/comparison.php?PARTNER=snowdog20
Vishal P. Rao
Administrator
Joined: 23 Jun 2005
Posts: 1322
#2 · Posted: 5 Jun 2008 00:57


Amazing stuff!

__________________
aleker
Forums Member
Joined: 18 May 2008
Posts: 36
#3 · Posted: 5 Jun 2008 12:04


Those are pretty funny.

__________________
Your Reply
   :) ;) :-( ... Disable smilies

» Username  » Password 
Only registered users are allowed to post here. Please enter your login/password details upon posting a message, or sign up first.
Messages not conforming to the forum rules will not be approved or, deleted without any explanation.
Please do not post email addresses. If essential, obfuscate them (user [at] domain.com or something like that).
Please do not apply BOLD to entire post.
 


Page loading time (secs): 0.090

Custom Search
Member Ranking · Terms of Use · Privacy Policy · About Us · Contact Us · Support Us · Friends

© 2004-2011 Work at Home Forum. All rights reserved.