How To Win Friends and Influence People

Discussion in 'Network/Multi-level Marketing' started by kesharn2, Apr 28, 2009.

  1. kesharn2

    kesharn2 New Member

    I just started reading this book by Dale Carnegie. Actually, I only just finished Chapter 1, but it really gave me food for thought on the first principle to dealing with people:

    Don't Criticise Them

    I'm not an advid criticisor (sp?) anyway, it's not in my makeup to do it since I've started this whole process of self improvement. Anyway, what I'm trying to get at is people really dont see their faults if you criticise them. They're already in their head making up their defense while you're stating your criticisms. They automatically put themselves into a defense mode, so your message never gets through and then they resent you...

    So applying this to your team, eventhough you've got that distributor that refuses to read your email you send him and insists on asking you questions you've already answered....A THOUSAND TIMES, or the distributor that wants to know "wheres his cut" and he's been in the business for 2 weeks, or the distributor that wants to know how you're really getting your leads when you've shown him a thousand times...oh i can go on and on [​IMG])....Even when you have all that going on to even utter a criticism about him will always be moot. It's best to just keep your eye on your goals and keep moving. Help those on your team that are really trying to help themselves. Maybe that irresponsible disributor will "come around" one day, and when he does he'll be more than glad he's on your team.

  2. Franklin

    Franklin New Member

    Hello Kesharn, I love this book I have it in audio and you just reminded me of it and I think I will listen to it this weekend just to refresh. I'm just like you not of big fan of criticism I love sincere feedback.

    It's so amazing that this book so old and still can be apply to today's life. I like the part of the book that he talks about how we should or learn from the dog. I will leave it there I won't spoil the book. I recommend this book for anyone but specially people in network marketing.

    How To Win Friends and Influence People - Dale Carnegie

    Let us know when you finish with it and give us a full review. [​IMG]
  3. samda

    samda Member

    Great one...

    Adding a point. Just understand their thoughts and play with them on this... This will definitely influence them...
  4. jay284

    jay284 New Member


    That is a great book you are reading! You will literally take something HUGE out of every chapter! I hate reading, but I read through that book in a breeze!

    When you finish that book, you should check out "Think and Grow Rich" by Napoleon Hill. It expands on a lot of the things mentioned in Win Friends/Influence People.
  5. kesharn2

    kesharn2 New Member

    Thanks, jay284!

    I've actually already read Think And Grow Rich, and loved it! Franklin thanks for not spoiling the rest of the book [​IMG] Yeah, part of the thing I love about this indutrsry are the great reads that turn you into an awesome person.

    Kesha Sowell
  6. timhale

    timhale New Member

    I think it's a great book as well!

    It highlights a lot of time-tested methods for working with people effectively!

    After all, isn't this the trick to business!?

    Thanks for sharing!

  7. A8ch

    A8ch Gold Member

    Kesha, that's an interesting book you are reading. It will sharpen your perspective and introspective. You'll be amazed at the tremendous difference a little bit of focused attention can make. You'll get a lot of value out of it.

    I agree that criticism is not something most people can take objectively and it requires tact and diplomacy to deliver it effectively. It's a natural defense mechanism to put up your guard if you believe someone is taking shots at you, regardless of how well-meaning they might be.

    Add to that the fact the most of us don't really listen attentively anyway. We're too busy thinking about what we are going to say next to hear and absorb what is being said to us. It's no wonder there is so much miscommunication.

    I believe the clearer we can recognize and understand our own individual short-comings, and accept ourselves inspite of them, the more effective we will become at understanding and communicating with our neighbor.

    Meanwhile, life goes on... [​IMG]

  8. kesharn2

    kesharn2 New Member

    Great stuff Hermas!

  9. ateamfuntimer

    ateamfuntimer New Member

    What first got me to this thread was the title. Great title I might add. It's been years since I first was introduced to Dale Carnegie. It was when I started as a distributor with Amway. The knowledge I learned back then has been invaluable to me in my business ventures.

    In addition I saw a few names of other posters that I like on this forum. Im inspired to see others that add great value to this forum. They are passing down the knowledge that they have acquired to those that are looking to learn.

    Great job. This will be a thread I follow so that I can share my thoughts as well.
  10. drunyan

    drunyan New Member

    I bought this book the first week I signed up with my MLM, and I read it in a weekend. I found it so interesting. My copy now has yellow highlights all throughout, not to mention a notebook full of notes I took as I was reading it. The information in this book is just so down to earth and sensible. I hope you enjoy it as I did.
  11. gingerva

    gingerva Guest

    Great book Kesha. I am re-reading it from years ago and the message stays the same, doesn't it?

    Thanks for the reminder that criticism doesn't work. We need to work with those on our team that deserve our time and support and not those who simply need it. They can be a drain on the whole team both emotionally and financially.

    They'll come around when they are ready to commit and if not, well we really are better off anyway.

    Thanks, Ginger Hogue
  12. BruceMiles

    BruceMiles New Member

    Simply Great! Thanks! I would like to add my thoughts that first make your contacts in an enhanced way that people would find it trouble-free to find you.

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