Stress Problem, Feedback Needed

Discussion in 'Stress Management' started by Izrul, Jan 24, 2008.

  1. Izrul

    Izrul New Member

    Hello there.

    Most experts say that if we want to achieve life without stress, we do not need to avoid it but "response" to the situation you're facing.

    Any idea what this mean?

    What do you think about this?

    Best Regards,

    Izrul Fizal
  2. Scott Powers

    Scott Powers New Member

    Yes, because when you respond to the situation and deal with it,
    you will not be haunted by avoiding it.
    It's actually MORE stressful trying to constantly avoid stress.
    Just face your problem like a man and quit being a wussy.
    Once you overcome the problem, you will feel as though a weight has been lifted off your shoulders. But running and hiding is hopeless and futile 'cause there aint no such thing as a "stress-free life".
    Stress will find you no matter where you hide.
    Stress can be managed, but you'll never be truly free from it until you die.
  3. Newbie Shield

    Newbie Shield Gold Member

    Hi Izrul,

    It just means that instead of worrying about what is going on with it or what will happen, just do what you can about it and be happy with your effort. Don't worry about the outcome when you have done your best to manage the problem.

    90% of our fears never manifest so why give them any power?


    ~Newbie Shield~
  4. Izrul

    Izrul New Member

    Thanks for the feedback guys.

    I also managed to do some study regarding this topic with my friends. Most of them response saying that they are willing to handle their stress heads on, but they fear of the outcome that people will criticize them if they fail.

    This just show that most of them still worry what will happen "if I do that or if I do this" dilemma.
  5. Vishal P. Rao

    Vishal P. Rao Administrator Staff Member

    Quoting: IzrulMost experts say that if we want to achieve life without stress, we do not need to avoid it but "response" to the situation you're facing.

    There is a still better way - accept it. Responding may either bring you to situation you wanted or not. If it's what you wanted, then you are happy. And if it's not what you wanted, you are unhappy.

    Accepting the situation as it is and surrendering to the divine brings enormous peace and is the truest way to bliss. It's very difficult but practicing it will change you are life. Seriously, there is nothing in this life you have absolute control over. You may die the very next moment. It may flood in your area. And so on... Start by accepting smaller shortcomings in your life. Say your neighbor's attitude. Creaking noise of your bathroom door. A particular dress of your spouse. And so on... Once you make it a habit of accepting things as it is, you can accept life as it is.
  6. Izrul

    Izrul New Member

    As always Vishal, your input into this really is aspiring. I somewhat agree and disagree with your point though.

    Yeah, if it is a small things that cause us stress like you've mentioned, we maybe can accept it. However, if it is a big or heavy things like for example, a naughty neighbor who for no reason kick our trash can outside our house until all the smelly rubbish come out every single day, we simply could not accept or ignore it.

    Even if we accept the smallest thing around us that cause us a bit of stress will become big sooner or later.

    I will go for the "response" to the stress rather than accepting it. However, I really appreciate your thought into this.[​IMG]
  7. Vishal P. Rao

    Vishal P. Rao Administrator Staff Member

    I agree with you on the neighbor part. I don't say you shouldn't act on anything. Act, but don't keep fighting. That's my point. One must learn to surrender too. But you can surrender only when you see the futility in expecting things to go your way all the time. And it's a very difficult act I must say. Much much difficult because your ego is at stake. Only when you drop your ego, can you surrender totally and it cannot be advised. It has to be experienced.

    Quoting: IzrulEven if we accept the smallest thing around us that cause us a bit of stress will become big sooner or later.

    It grows only if there's some resistance. You might have surrendered superficially. If you have fully accepted it, there is no point of it growing.

    Thanks for differing [​IMG]
  8. reeg720

    reeg720 New Member

    there is no sense getting riled up when anything small happens, also whenever you get stressed just think, why is this stressful and why is this such a big deal. if it is a big deal then talk to someone about it and take a nice warm bath.
  9. lethalboom

    lethalboom New Member

    it is daft to get your blood boiling over little things, dont put them off, do it there and then. that way its out the way and you dont have to worry about it anymore
    good luck in getting rid of your stress [​IMG]
  10. successful2008

    successful2008 New Member

    I know exactly what this means. To avoid it, means you're not dealing with it. With me, when I have stress in my life, I talk about it. There is a good way to do that and it's with a positive mind. That is sometimes very hard to do. But, if you look at the stressful situation and don't react until you really looked at it, you'll respond to it better than if you just reacted right off the bat. With today beinf Father's Day, I was not stressed. I was sad. The saddness that I felt, was from my fathers death. I don't have him with me. So, what I did, was I talked to my husband. I know that my father's with me in spirit. I miss my father very much, but my father's still very much with me. So, that sad feeling that I had also gave me a smile because he's still with me. Life's too short to be stressed out all the time. Life will be so much better once you look at stress in a different way. I hope this sheds some light.

    To your massive success,
  11. A8ch

    A8ch Gold Member

    The stressful situations that occur in our lives probably cannot be avoided, for two reasons:

    1. Some situations we create ourselves, either through own own doing or due to negligence.
    2. Other situations are simply thrust upon us by Providence.

    Our role is to navigate these life challenges as best we can. The approach is very similar to climbing a staircase. Each challenge/step requires us to lift up and reach forward in order to make progress. That means taking action and responding with deliberate intent to conquer whatever situation we are faced with.

    And when we do get beyond the challenge and reach the next plateau, we should replay the scenario in our minds to understand the lessons we were meant to learn. The wisdon we gain is added to our arsenal for future situations.

  12. VictoriaNTC

    VictoriaNTC Silver Member

    Hello Izrul,

    When you have a little time, you might consider this:
    Go to YouTube, and type in Abraham-Hicks. There are many free videos which are fantastic.
    Many, many of my life questions have been answered via their DVD's and Books.

  13. djimelee

    djimelee New Member

    Hi!! stress as we all know, is a part of our daily lives, if we deliberately avoid it, then stress will come in any way in ur life, so better face it, deal with it but not too much.. and mostly pray is a best weapon and evrything will come orderly..godbless
  14. crittabur

    crittabur New Member

    Hi people,

    I like to write and let it out in words. Let people Know out in the open how you feel.It helps relieve the stress.At least for me.Check this out.Mabey someone has felt like this before.

    -Remembered when I die-

    I got butterflies in my stomache,knats eatting at my brain,
    now Iv'e done lost my mind,you know Iv'e gone insane.
    Now I'm runnin for cover,but there is nowhere to hide.
    Feels like there's worms in my guts gouging out my insides.
    Could it be just me,or is it plain insanity,
    playing with my head,mess with me and you'll soon be dead.
    Looking now at the future,as the present day goes by,
    No time to stop and ask,what the hell and why.
    Allways searching for the answers,never having a freaking clue.
    Wondering what this life's about,makes me wanna spew.
    The darkness is so black inside,my heart is filled with rage.
    This is no social book,you can't just turn the page.
    My coldness is the another thing,I know about myself,
    That I can't put aside or place upon a shelf.
    Hatefull thoughts and emptiness,dancing through my soul.
    It all builds up within my mind,perhaps the heads will roll.
    Suicidal violent acts,of wich I don't claim to fame.
    Rule part of a demented life,and I hang my head in shame.
    Thrashing and contorting,a disturbing wicked sight,
    That is what comes with the ones who walk without the light.
    Malicious mean and hurtfull,some think that I can be.
    All I have to say to them is quit thinking it's just me.
    These are some things that I recall,as I exhale a sigh.
    This isn't how I want to be, remembered when I die.
  15. nanlar

    nanlar New Member

    Like I have said before we can avoid stress by simply choosing a endeavor which we truly love. Your rewards will follow. If I find myself a little out of sorts I practice some deep breathing. I have actually gotten good at it. Try it!
  16. crosewood

    crosewood New Member

    stress will always be there. if it's not in our jobs, it's at home -- with the work we need to do, the chores that need to be finished, and the bills that need to get paid. there's no running away from it. the best response is to face it head on and deal. [​IMG]

    Izrul: Most experts say that if we want to achieve life without stress, we do not need to avoid it but "response" to the situation you're facing.
  17. mediafreak

    mediafreak New Member

    "Most experts say that if we want to achieve life without stress, we do not need to avoid it but "response" to the situation you're facing."

    This only means that you have to deal with it. Not avoid it.

    Here is a good explanation for you to read.

    Basically, stress is an unpleasant state of emotional and physiological arousal that people experience in situations that they perceive as dangerous or threatening to their well-being.

    It is a universal experience. It is a common phenomenon that each and everyone of us experience.

    Our bodies and minds have been designed with a 'fight or flight' reflex that helps to orient and become alert when we are faced with challenging or dangerous events. Our attention gets narrowed towards such events, and our brain instructs our bodies to prepare for possible physical action such as confronting the event physically or running away from the source of the danger.

    Stress can be good or bad. Sometimes, it is helpful, providing people with the extra energy or alertness they need. It could give a student the edge he or she needs to memorize or understand the lessons before the examination, for example. This good kind of stress is called eustress.

    On the other hand, it is often not helpful and could even be harmful when not managed effectively. For example, stress can be a cause for a hypertensive patient to increase the blood pressure level. This bad kind of stress is called distress, the kind of stress that people usually are referring to when they use the word stress.

    There are many ways to cope with stress. It is both positive and negative. Some people deal with stress by conforming to the negative and unhealthy methods such as addictions in alcohol, drugs, sex and gambling. These methods are considered dysfunctional because, over time, it results to making the situation worse for people rather than making it better.

    On the other hand, there are many positive methods of coping with stress. Some of them are:
    =Healthy Diet
    =Assertive Communication
    =Time Management

    Using these methods would not give immediate relief from stress. It only works after one makes a commitment to practicing them repeatedly over time. And to note, it takes some faith, determination and a certain amount of discipline to make it possible for these strategies to work.

    So find ways to deal with it. You cannot get over with it if you avoid it.! The more avoidance you give, the more stress you will get.
  18. shmeeko69

    shmeeko69 Member

    Some people are naturally more stressful & have
    higher blood pressure levels.

    There is not really any quick ways to eliminate stress,
    but mainly to take a step back & evaluate what
    your doing & how your life is going, can be a starting
    point, about what needs doing.

    I always try to keep a level head & know that with
    this business & others, there will be obstacles &
    daily problems to overcome & to accept that as
    part of my daily routine.

    Mark [​IMG]
  19. player

    player New Member

    same thing as phobias, feel the fear but dont run from it. fear can be healthy in the right setting. stress is an emotion, emotions can be good. stress in business is a new way of dealing with your emotions, feel blessed by them.
  20. Jean LA

    Jean LA New Member

    Izrul: Most experts say that if we want to achieve life without stress, we do not need to avoid it but "response" to the situation you're facing.

    If you have problems and stress in your way, you should deal with it and let it be a good stumbling block taken as a lesson rather than get away from it today and still it is there tommorrow.

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